The gutter language of Romblon politics

Roll out the carpet,
get out the barrel,
politics, for all intents and purposes,
is here,
has become many Romblomanons’:
daily fare;
bread and butter;
primary occupation;
chief entertainment;
major problem;
field of dreams;
worst nightmare;
and cause of division,
exactly eleven months
before the May 2010 election.

In order is a qualification. When I say “May 2010 election”, I don’t mean I am certain there will be one. I merely refer to the date set by the Constitution for a regular election. That’s on the second Monday of May every three years.

If the Constitution will be followed, there will be one. However, this administration of La Lola Loca is not exactly popular for following the letter and spirit of the Basic Law. It is, in fact, the worst violator of the Constitution. Look at how it lies through its teeth regarding human rights.

Now, let’s go back to Romblon politics.

The observation that politics now consume many Romblomanons is not without basis. Go to http://romblonpost.com/ and see for yourself. This online medium is populated by people whose passion for the voodoo craft is such that reading their posts could lead one to commit suicide, if he or she is weak-hearted.

This online community, which I have visited a few times in the past and in which I have posted some pieces from my blog at http://bunsurancaravan.blogspot.com/, is a lively forum of “unknown” but articulate Romblomanons who have a lot of things to say about politics and our politicians.

Alas, most of the things they post online are vulgar epithets that belong to the gutter of social discourse. The ‘posters’—divided along ideological, minus and plus, pros and cons, negative and positive sides of the political equation—quarrel most of the time, with no one but among themselves.

They call our politicians and each other names. Loud, colorful, dirty names. Names that will make mothers cry when it is their sons or daughters being called by such name. Names that if published in the mainstream media could earn the authors a string of libel suits.

I said many of the ‘posters’ are ‘unknown’ because almost everyone in the online community hides behind the skirts of invented aliases accompanied by invented photos and caricatures. No one seems to care at http://romblonpost.com/ about their identities or the identities of the individuals they are exchanging pointed blurbs with. Or, are they afraid to be fingered as the authors of the daily name-calling spree?

I make this observation with exceptions. There are ‘posters’ in the site who back up their allegations with hard evidence, such as official documents. This is true in the case of Gov. Jojo Beltran’s recall of his order installing one Richard Lozada as officer-in-charge of the provincial general services office after its chief, the controversial Anthony “Jojo” Rugas, was ordered suspended by the Ombudsman.

The exchange of blurbs in the site after the two orders of Beltran were posted ran like this:

Tisoy, Jr.: “Ginagawang tanga lang ni Rugas ang Ombudsman. O baka naman walang maglakas loob na kastiguhin itong si Tony Rugas dahil maraming ninong ang animal na ‘to. Ano ba ang nangyari dito?

Carlos: “Jojo the respondent was suspended by Jojo the governor through Office Order No. 08-099 dated October 28, 2008, but in less than a week, Jojo the governor recalled his own order through another Office Order No. 08-102 dated November 3, 2008. Jojo the respondent is no doubt "malakas." That's what they are in power for.”

How about Madrona, the Congressman?

Oh, Budoy is fair game to Romblon ‘posters’. Yes, he has some defenders, such as this person who answers to the name ‘nonong’, apparently a paid hack, but ‘nonong’ is so alone because he/she is outnumbered by a horde of anti-Madrona partisans.

Read this exchange last week:

Ginoo: “June 22 aalis na ang grupo ni Budoy para bumili ng bagong barko. Hay, salamat naman, kung hindi pa sa payola ng cha-cha, ‘di pa ulit magkakaroon ng barko ang Romblon. Mga kababayan ko: tangkilikin natin ito ha? Para naman may masakyan tayo ng libre sa 2010 pag uwi natin para sa eleksiyon. Mga ex-MBRS staff, forget the past, okay?”

Ghost Whisperer: “Buti na lang may cha-cha. Kung wala ‘di na makakabili ng boat ang multong (derogatory name deleted). Saang lupalop naman ng mundo bibili ng barko ang multong (derogatory name deleted)? Sana kung saan man ‘yun may A(H1N1) virus para mahawa ang . . . . Sana Lord, please. Ito lang ang consolation diyan. Malulugi din ang barkong ‘yan o kaya baka lumubog pa bago nito masilayan ang lupang hinirang. You know, God is not sleeping. We will have our sweet revenge against the multong . . . .

Taga-Cogon Sr.: “Hindi lang sa payola sa con-ass manggagaling ang pambili ni M. B. ng bagong barko. Malaki rin na bahagi ay mula sa pork barrel funds ng (epithet deleted). Para hindi mahalata na malaki ang kinukupit niya sa pork barrel funds, ang diskarte niya ay ang DPWH, through Dodoy ‘Jalozjoz’ Perez, ang pinapa-prente sa projects. Si Dodoy Perez ang bumibida sa harapan habang binuburiki ng (derogatory name deleted) ang pondo na dapat mapunta sa mamamayan. Noong binili ang kauna-unahang bakal na barko ng MBRS taong 1989, maraming Romblomanon na may kaya sa buhay ang kinuha nilang kasosyo. Pero nang dumami ang barko mula sa parehong sistema na pambuburiki sa pork barrel funds, unti-unti ring sinipa sa eksena ang mga kasosyong ito. Pinagloloko sa bigayan ng dibidendo. Sa sobrang inis, lumayas na lang and mga ito. ‘Di ko lang sure kung andiyan pa ang mga kagaya nina Thornton, Susing Falo, Rizal Morato at marami pang iba na dinugas ng pamilya M. . . .”

The above is only a sampling of the exchanges in the community. The ‘posters’, I should mention, are equally derisive of the political opposition (does it exist?), notably the likes of Dr. Lolong Firmalo, Vice Governor Alice Fetalvero, SP Member Mel Madrid and Department of Agriculture undersecretary Bernie Fondevilla.

A few questions about Firmalo and Fondevilla.Where are they? Is Firmalo hatching his political comeback in his Quezon City clinic? Is Fondevilla having sleepless nights trying to become a congressman or a full-fledged secretary?

Are they politicians still? Or has Madrona co-opted them to forget their dreams of empire?

Come on, people. Will somebody please unzip the mouths of this two?